


i am so scared of what i'll look like In the end

by amorias



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Bluepulse, M/M, Post-Endgame, Unrequited Love, literally do not read this if you haven't finished s2, spoilers in the first line
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-01-01
Packaged: 2018-03-04 19:44:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3086291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amorias/pseuds/amorias
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They grew apart because he fell in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i am so scared of what i'll look like In the end

He fell in love because they grew close. Maybe it was after Wally's death, or, more likely, he was just lying to himself this whole time – yeah, he was supposed to come back to the past to prevent Blue from being on mode and taking over all of future's humanity, and that was totally crash, he was totally down to _take_ him down, but that was before... whatever this is, happened.

Yeah, whatever this is, because Bart is just going to pretend he has no idea what is going on in his own head, and that will be good enough, probably.

 

“It's Kid Flash!” Someone calls from the crowd as Bart emerges from the rubble of the explosion, holding an unconscious Captain Cold by the hood, and his blood turns freezing inside his veins, because he's still not used to being called that. He looks at the people, partitioned off by other superheroes who were stuck doing crowd control around the building that was set to explode at any second, and they all stare at him in adoration. He can feel the bile rising in his throat.

“You take this one, Blue,” he says, quiet enough that he knows only the scarab will pick it up, and he dashes for the nearest zeta port, ignoring Jaime's calls of “Kid Flash” until he can't hear them at all anymore.

 

“Alright esé, what was that back there?” Jaime asks the instant he materializes in the Watchtower, crossing his armored arms over his chest. “You _know_ I still don't have a great rep with the public since the whole Reach thing, how could you just leave me back there?”

Bart crashes into Jaime without warning, cowl off and green eyes leaking unattractively.

“Hey, hey, hermano, what's wrong?” He asks, his voice softening in a way that Bart wishes was just for him. He retracts his armor back into the scarab and brings up his arms to wrap them around the other boy's torso, which only made Impulse's – no, Kid Flash's, now, sometimes he forgets to even call himself that – heart beat faster and forced him to push his face into the folds of Jaime's shirt that smells like smoke from the explosion.

“They all think I'm him, they all think I'm Wally, and they'll never even know--” He takes a moment to sniff back snot from dripping out of his nose here, and ugh, this is so not crash, but he can't help it. “How can I wear this?” He lowers his voice, just barely. “I feel like such a fraud.”

He's a fraud, for this, for coming back to the past under the pretenses of meeting Grandpa Barry, for letting his original mission fall to pieces because he tripped over his feet at the wrong times and fell in love with this boy, who is warm and solid and everything that he lacked in the future, because the Blue Beetle there is nothing like the one here.

“Hey, no, come on, Bart,” Jaime says, urging Bart's head up with a hand under his chin and pushing the messy, wind-swept pieces of hair away from his forehead. The speedster tries not to think about how easy it would be to push up onto his tiptoes and kiss him right now, he could do it and be gone before he even know what hit him. He blinks his gaze to the side. “Wally would've wanted it this way, remember? He was going to give it to you anyway. He trusted you, hermano, to take care of the Kid Flash mantle.”

Bart's grip on the fabric of the other boy's shirt tightens and he can feel the knot in his throat loosen its hold on him a little, and he laughs a little bit here, tucking his chin down towards his chest.

“Y'know, this is why I love you, Jaime,” he whispers, mouth going too fast for his brain again, and he freezes – he's not sure if he's ever been this still, but he knows he's said something he shouldn't have, and his brain is going into overdrive.

“Love?” Blue stumbles over the word, lifting his hands up and turning his head just slightly to the side – just enough that Bart can tell his scarab is telling him something. He's spent too many minutes that feel like hours to the speedster watching him make that same movement, listening him talk back to a voice no one else can hear. He doesn't need to be able to hear the scarab to know he's analyzing his blood pressure and heart rate and all the other things that show that he's not lying, and he's actually in love with the other hero.

“But we're both--” Jaime says uncertainly, taking a step backwards, putting his hands uselessly into his pockets.

“I know, I know, I know,” he says, forcibly measuring his voice so he doesn't speed over his words to the point where Jaime can't even understand what he's saying. He breathes out and runs a hand through his auburn hair. “I know,” he repeats finally, dropping his arms to his sides and shrugging helplessly. “I know I'm not even supposed to _be_ here and I'm probably totally jacking up the time stream by even saying this, like at all, but you know me, I'm... no good at keeping my mouth shut.” An almost pathetic laugh, if you could even call the brief exhalation of breath that escapes his mouth that at all, passes his lips, and he feels entirely moded. His heart is beating so fast it hurts his chest, and he really just wants to run, run at his top speed and get out of here, but even if he did, he would be a streak of yellow and it would feel wrong.

The only thing that's felt real at all was Blue, and he scrubs at the stinging behind his eyes to forget that fact, and waits for the minutes that feel like days to him for a response.

“Bart, dude... I dunno--” And he takes another step back, and that's all the rejection that Bart really needs or can handle, and he takes off, the zeta tube announcing his departure before Jaime can even blink, and he's gone.

They're all distance after that, barely making eye contact or speaking except when necessary. Bart steals glances across the briefing room that he knows the scarab detects, and in a fleeting, irrational thought, he wishes he had a scarab too, to tell him if Jaime was looking at him the same way.

 

Bart spends the agonizing 3 minutes it takes Jaime to get to the door after he knocks pacing the porch and fighting the urge to run away. He's in the middle of tapping his foot so rapidly against the cement that it starts to crack under him when Blue answers the door, blinking at his appearance.

“Did you run all the way here?” Jaime asks quietly as the other boy pants on his doorstep in civvies, clothes covered in dust and soles of his shoes practically worn down to nothing. He takes a second to catch himself, both his body and his breath, trying to collect his normally speeding thoughts. For once, he just really wants to slow down, and think about what he's going to say, and he's breaking character, but who cares because it's _Jaime_ , and he's already seen him so out of character it doesn't even matter – he huffs out a breath. He's gotten off track again, and he can't even remember what he was going to say. He finally looks up, and his eyes can only meet the other boy's dark ones for a second before he looks away.

“I'm sorry,” is what Bart comes up with before his mouth goes totally dry, before he bolts down the steps faster than Jaime can think, leaving only a trail of dust in his wake that leaves his eyes stinging.

They grew apart because he had to go and fall in love.

**Author's Note:**

> wow i have never written this ship before but i am in literal bluepulse hell i stayed up until 3am reading fics someone deliver me from this hell. here ya go, hope you like it and if you do like/comment etc etc [peace signs]


End file.
